[Intro]
G G7 Csus2 D7sus4 D7
[Verse]
G G7
Sid Vicious played a four-string Fender bass guitar and couldn't sing
Csus2 D7sus4 D7
And everybody hated him except the ones who loved him
G G7
A ukulele has four strings, but Sid did not play ukulele
Csus2 D7sus4 D7
He did smack and probably killed his girlfriend Nancy Spungen
[Verse]
G G7
If only Sid had had a ukulele, maybe he could have been happy
Csus2 D7sus4 D7
Maybe he would not have suffered such a sad end
G G7
He maybe would have not done all that heroin instead
Csus2 D7sus4 D7
He maybe would've sat around just singing nice songs to his girlfriend
[Chorus]
G G7
So play your favorite cover song, especially if the words are wrong
Csus2 D7sus4 D7
Cos even if your grades are bad, it doesn't mean you're failing
G G7
Do your homework with a fork and eat your fruit loops in the dark
Csus2 D7sus4 D7
And bring your etch-a-sketch to work and play your ukulele
[Bridge]
Csus2 D7
Ukulele small and forceful, ukulele, brave and peaceful
G Csus2
You can play the ukulele too it is painfully simple
Csus2 D7
Play your ukulele badly, play your ukulele loudly
F6
Ukulele banish evil, ukulele save the people,
Ukulele gleaming golden on the top of every steeple
[Verse]
G G7
Lizzie Borden took an axe, and gave her mother forty whacks
Csus2 D7sus4 D7
Then gave her father forty-one, and left a tragic puzzle
G G7
If only they had given her an instrument, those puritans
Csus2 D7sus4 D7
Had lost the plot completely, see what happens when you muzzle
[Verse]
G G7
A person's creativity and do not let them sing and scream
Csus2 D7sus4 D7
And nowadays it's worse 'cause kids have automatic handguns
G G7
It takes about an hour to teach someone to play the ukulele
Csus2 D7sus4 D7
About same to teach someone to build a standard pipe bomb you do the math-s-
[Chorus]
G G7
So play your favorite cover song, especially if the words are wrong
Csus2 D7sus4 D7
Cos even if your grades are bad, it doesn't mean you're failing
G G7
Do your homework with a fork and eat your fruit loops in the dark
Csus2 D7sus4 D7
And bring your flask of Jack to work and play your ukulele
[Bridge]
Csus2 D7
Ukulele, thing of wonder, ukulele, wand of thunder
G Csus2
You can play the ukulele too in London and Down Under
Csus2 D7
Play Joan Jett, and play Jacques Brel and Eminem and Neutral Milk
F6
Tell the children crush the hatred, play your ukulele naked
If anybody tries to steal your ukulele, let them take it
[Verse]
G G7
Imagine there's no music, imagine there are no songs
Csus2 D7sus4 D7
Imagine that John Lennon wasn't shot in front of his apartment
G G7 Csus2
Now imagine if John Lennon had composed "Imagine" for the ukulele
D7sus4 D7
Maybe people would have truly got the message
[Verse]
G G7
You may think my approach is simple-minded and naive
Csus2 D7sus4 D7
Like if you want to change the world then why not quit and feed the hungry
G G7
But people for millennia have needed music to survive
Csus2 D7sus4 D7
And that's why I've promised John that I will not feel guilty
[Verse]
G G7
So play your favorite Beatles song and make the subway fall in love
Csus2 D7sus4 D7
They're only $19.95, that isn't lots of money
G G7
Play until the sun comes up and play until your fingers suffer
Csus2 D7sus4 D7
Play LCD Soundsystem songs on your ukulele
[Verse]
G G7
Quit the bitching on your blog and stop pretending art is hard
Csus2 D7sus4 D7
Just limit yourself to three chords and do not practice daily
G G7
You'll minimize some stranger's sadness with a piece of wood and plastic
Csus2 D7sus4 D7
Holy fuck it's so fantastic, playing ukulele
[Verse]
G G7
Eat your homework with a fork and do your fruit loops in the dark
Csus2
And bring your flask of Jack to work, your etch-a-sketch, your vibrator
your fear of heights, your Nikon lens
[Verse]
G G7
Your mom and dad, your disco stick, your soundtrack from "Karate Kid"
Csus2 D7sus4 D7
Your Ginsu knives, your rosary, your new Rebecca Black CD
G G7
Your favorite room, your bowie knife, your stuffed giraffe, your new glass eye
Csus2 D7sus4 D7
Your sousaphone, your breakfast tea, your Nick Drake tapes, your giving tree
G G7
Your ice cream truck, your missing wife, your will to live, your urge to cry
Csus2
Remember we're all going to die
G G
so play your ukulele